tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post1181275885660536056..comments2023-10-30T05:46:59.343-04:00Comments on The Doubting Writer: Another year, another post like thisJeffOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07947660745120963286noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post-74208805395850872282018-10-06T06:53:02.319-04:002018-10-06T06:53:02.319-04:00Thanks for the thoughtful response, Dolorah.
Whil...Thanks for the thoughtful response, Dolorah.<br /><br />While I have no doubt there are some opportunists, attention hogs and gold diggers out there who jump at the chance to throw their name in the ring in hopes of reaping fame/money/attention/revenge in cases like Cosby's or Weinstein's, I suspect the instances where <i>that first claim</i> is false are extremely rare. You see what women put themselves through to come forward; why would anyone go through that, especially if there's a real likelihood it won't be proven? <br /><br />The politics of the Kavanaugh thing are awful, and unfortunately undermine victims everywhere. That goes both ways. Neither side cares a whit about Dr. Ford's well being. It's also evident that Republicans had no desire to get to the truth of the matter, which we still don't know.<br /><br />Good on you for teaching your sons. That is the first line in shifting the culture. Thanks again for commenting.JeffOhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07947660745120963286noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post-60228538171251939432018-10-06T06:36:35.546-04:002018-10-06T06:36:35.546-04:00I hope we are, too. Sadly, I'm having a harder...I hope we are, too. Sadly, I'm having a harder and harder time being optimistic about things.JeffOhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07947660745120963286noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post-25491624492498852162018-10-06T06:35:26.921-04:002018-10-06T06:35:26.921-04:00That is kind of typical of the response, isn't...That is kind of typical of the response, isn't it, Donna? "We're having a problem with rape, so let's teach the women how to avoid it." Of course, the men who commit the 'knife to the neck' kind of rape are not going to learn anything from this, but there are obviously lots of men who don't know better what they should and shouldn't do who could.<br />JeffOhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07947660745120963286noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post-21374869439335819112018-10-05T15:50:36.048-04:002018-10-05T15:50:36.048-04:00I wonder if it was changed then because there were...I wonder if it was changed then because there weren't men in the classes they gave us in the mid 70s.Donna K. Weaverhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15763832177263927311noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post-12650470458285668962018-10-04T22:25:46.302-04:002018-10-04T22:25:46.302-04:00I was in the Army in the late 70s and I remember t...I was in the Army in the late 70s and I remember the class (or film) about sexual assault, but we ALL had to watch it: men and women. Stacy McKitrickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07898731847653710759noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post-44611235138252176432018-10-03T20:30:30.040-04:002018-10-03T20:30:30.040-04:00Well, I'm old now, so I don't worry about ...Well, I'm old now, so I don't worry about it like I used to, but it's still dangerous. Rape isn't about sex. It's about violence and domination. When I joined the Army, it was a time when a lot of fields previously not open to women opened up, and a ton of women joined. The incidence of sexual assault increased by huge amounts, to the point where they started having classes for the the women at part of their sign-in process at each new duty assignment. I've wondered if they ever considered giving classes to the men to explain things recognizing consent or how not to rape a woman. Kind of blows the mind, doesn't it?Donna K. Weaverhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15763832177263927311noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post-81336680789553758062018-10-03T19:08:43.876-04:002018-10-03T19:08:43.876-04:00Sadly, we do have to think about it a lot and that...Sadly, we do have to think about it a lot and that's definitely something that needs to change. The news has been so disturbing these last few weeks - sometimes it's hard to believe we're heading in the right direction, although from working with kids and their families for so many years, I do think we are moving forward. I hope so!Jemi Fraserhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02214408467456320167noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post-84076128077450930052018-10-03T02:40:00.401-04:002018-10-03T02:40:00.401-04:00I worry all the time. I taught my daughter to worr...I worry all the time. I taught my daughter to worry all the time also.<br /><br />But, I also learned to "walk with a purpose, my head up," scanning my environment (or social event) for dangers. I don't hide from men, and I don't stay silent if I'm threatened. I taught my daughter THAT too.<br /><br />It hasn't been just "a man's world" since at least the 60's. A lot of the recent accusations seem to be more of a "fad" than actual assaults. As for the Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinhart accusations: I can't imagine what, 60 women or more each, throughout their very public careers, all kept silent all that time. Not even disclosing to despicable celeb magazines (rags) to sensationalize for their 15 minutes of fame.<br /><br />I can't help but think the Kavanaugh thing is a political ploy. Teens pranking each other, drunken frat parties. I know bad things happen in adolescence, and as young adults. Sometimes its just a growing up thing. No, rape is not a growing up thing, and there are some really sick young people, always has been.<br /><br />But I don't know if any of the accusations are real or not. Its hard to tell. I just hope it makes it easier for women/girls to speak up at the moment it happens and not wait 40 years. And not confuse flirtation with harassment.<br /><br />I also have four sons. I've taught them to always be aware that they are an unintentional threat, but it should not stop them from being polite, offering help when the situation seems required, to actively seek a girlfriend, and to speak up/question if a girl is seemingly too . . promiscuous. Or if a guy is too familiar. We want our young people to date, to make out, eventually marry and have families. Right?<br /><br />Men/boys also have to be constantly vigilant about putting themselves in situations where a woman/girl could accuse them of sexual harassment/assault. What if Simon Cowell had kissed a female contestant instead of Katey Perry kissing a guy? Would that be sexual assault, instead of an "ahh, so sad" moment? Family Fued host Richard Dawson kissed all the female contestants - should they all claim sexual harassment?<br /><br />The world is a sue happy place, and it makes it harder for actual victims to get justice.dolorahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08715849844092553699noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post-82497678310541158092018-10-02T06:12:52.200-04:002018-10-02T06:12:52.200-04:00Thanks, Stacy. It's a shame that we live in a ...Thanks, Stacy. It's a shame that we live in a world where more than half the population has to be constantly aware of where they are and who's around them and can't just be in the moment.JeffOhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07947660745120963286noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8281000668036619727.post-74888090235275335392018-10-01T08:18:42.895-04:002018-10-01T08:18:42.895-04:00To answer your question "When do women worry ...To answer your question "When do women worry about being sexually assaulted?" My answer is "All the time." It's why I don't go walking through parks by myself. No, I've never been assaulted. I just know how easy it could happen (and my mother's insistence to be careful was pretty much drilled into my head, too).Stacy McKitrickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07898731847653710759noreply@blogger.com